Indecision and Pain

I've been a real asshole this election season, not making up my mind, more irrational than a woman on the rag and just generally disgusted by the whole damn mess, all of these things complicating matters for me.

McCain perpetually looks constipated and Obama is pissing me off with the incessant whining about racism. And they're both so full of bullshit their eyes are brown (or turning brown.... I don't know what color McCain's eyes are).

John, go take a shit, already. You'll feel better and so will I. Dude, you're OLD, you really shouldn't be spending your sunset years so ANGRY all the time. And if you don't really want to be President, an aura you throw off in tidal waves likely to drown me, why are you even running? Could anyone have possibly conducted a WORSE campaign? I don't want to hear all the shit about why Obama is the wrong guy for the job; I want to hear all the shit about why YOU are the right guy for the job. You completely fucked yourself in that last debate, when you had the chance to show me what you can do for me and instead wasted it on the same old smears like every other campaign I've had to reluctantly endure.

Barry, get over yourself, already. You ain't the descendant of a slave and I ain't the descendant of a slave owner, and my white skin doesn't automatically make me a racist; but your constant harping on it makes me think you are. And you really need to do something with your wife's mouth, since she's NOT helping you any - she's an even bigger racist than you are. Answer a fucking question when someone asks, don't respond with eloquent nothingness. And buy some reality with some of your royalties: Why should I, someone with a disability who chooses to remain in the workforce, support some lazy fuck who wants to sit and watch the cable TV all day that I can't afford for myself? Spread the wealth, my ass - make them get the fuck up and help carry the fucking load and there wouldn't be such a need to spread.

NOW THAT I'VE PISSED SOMEONE OFF WITH MY RACIST COMMENTS: I know what it's like to be on the receiving end of division and bigotry: I am a Hearing woman married to a Deaf man, and I'll tell you, there are a whole lot more Deaf with a whole lot more hatred inside against Hearing folks than has brewed amongst blacks and whites. They just aren't so blatantly ugly about it, at least not on a grand scale like the KKK or anything; but some of those motherfuckers are downright MEAN, when you're dealing with them one-on-one. One thing I'll give them, though, is they seem to have transcended racial boundaries in a manner that has been so elusive to the rest of us: Whether you're black, white, or brown, as long as you're DEAF, you belong; everyone else is shit.

Back on point. This election has been horrifying for me. I am terrified to cast a vote, one way or the other. If I vote for Obama, I get Obama and all that his socialist agenda entails. If I vote for McCain, I risk facing the racial/social uprising and riots that could follow when he "steals" the election. If I vote for a third-party candidate, I get Obama and all that his socialist agenda entails - those third-party guys will drain more from the Republican candidate but still not attain enough to matter (since the Electoral College will never place someone in office that is not Democratic or Republican), so the Democratic candidate still wins.

BUT....

I cannot just throw my vote in for the guy everyone else wants, because I do not stand behind his ideologies; nor can I just throw my vote in for the other guy, because he's the "lesser of two evils," because I do not stand behind HIS ideologies, either (and seriously, he's not exactly "less evil"). So that's where I've been for months, beating this shit around in my brain and not making a decision.

SHIT OR GET OFF THE POT.

My grandma used to say that to me all the time. Do your deed or move over and let someone else do theirs. I have decided to "shit." I will not just get off the pot, because my vote - my FREEDOM - my RIGHTS AS AN AMERICAN CITIZEN - are just too important to me to do anything other than vote my conscience.

Twice I have voted for H. Ross Perot. Twice I have voted for Ralph Nader. I seriously considered throwing in for him again, but I have finally found my candidate:

ALAN KEYES.

Alan Keyes is awesome. This guy is totally ME - if I were a black guy instead of a white chick. Why isn't he getting more press? Oh, yeah.... He's not a Dummycrap or a Rethuglicon, and the MSM paves the way to the Presidency by deliberately excluding candidates like they don't even exist and obliterating them from public view. That's democracy for ya.

So with my vote for Keyes*, welcome to the Presidency, Barack Obama.

*Keyes, as far as I can tell, is not even on the ballot in Michigan, not even as a write in. So I can't even vote for the guy I want, the guy I think is the best man for the job.